What am I? 72 years old???

Yesterday I was sitting on the bus -- yes, as in I was using public transportation in Los Angeles. Not so bad, if you want to spend 2 hours on a trip that would be 15 minutes in your car. Meh, it's okay, I read a few magazines, including a New Yorker with an article about the creator of Spore, which looks like it's going to be a pretty damn cool game if you ask me.

Did you ask me? I can't remember. I really wasn't paying attention.

Anyway, when I wasn't reading the article, or enjoying the blast of hot exhaust in my face while waiting for my transfer, I was gazing off into space pondering how to spend my Christmas money this year. We aren't heading back east for the holiday, and some of our family members have already sent us cards with some green for spending on presies. It's nice to think about not spending the money on THE HOUSE for a change and to treat ourselves a bit.

So what is it that I really want this year? Hmm - I ticked off a few items in my head:

  • a teakettle, like, maybe a nice Revere
  • athletic socks - white short anklets please
  • a stopwatch

I mean really. What the fuck? I'm like a little old lady. I should consider a housedress, an earhorn and a new pinochle deck as viable Christmas list options.

Let's revamp this so I can give the illusion of I don't know what:

  • a spoon and some matches to freebase all my cocaine
  • knee high athletic socks, a japanese schoolgirl costume and a lifetime supply of dum dum pops
  • a stopwatch (well, I didn't tell you what I was going to use it for)